Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Writing - Piñata

On the heels of yesterday post I wanted to add the story by my friend Joe. Joe and I did this as a little exercise in writing. We came up with this idea after actually watching the bashing of a Piñata at a kids party. We both wrote our stories and then exchanged them. It's funny how similar we were on some parts of our stories, yet had enough different about them to make them unique. Lot of fun this was. Give it a try some time. I now give you:


Piñata

The first thing I remember is waking on cold metal. There were perhaps ten of us. Nobody seemed to know where we were. A woman walked up the aisle looking us over slowly. I could feel the person next to me grow tense.
“What’s wrong?” I whispered.
“Nobody who’s left has ever returned.”
“Where do they go?”
“Nobody knows where they go or what happens to them, but you wouldn’t believe some of the things I’ve heard sitting here.”
“Like what?”
“I don’t want to talk about it. Just do yourself a favor and don’t make eye contact when they come around. This isn’t the greatest place in the world, but at least we’re safe.”
With that he turned away with a distant look in his eyes. I don’t know what he’d heard, but it certainly had an effect on him.

Perhaps and hour had passed when a man came down the hall. He looked each of us over. The man next to me again grew tense and looked off. His body may have been next to me, but inside he was somewhere else.

The man in the aisle studied us for a short while, turning each of us to get a better look. I heard a small but chilling sound escape the man two down from me when he was lifted into the air. Again he was looked over. During the inspection process he fell several feet to the floor. They had dropped him. An awful cry came from below, and when he was lifted I could easily see he had broken his leg. The man who had been looking him over seemed not to care. He just shoved the poor broken creature back in his place with no regard for his broken limb. These were truly horrible uncaring creatures. My stomach dropped. How, I wondered could one treat another with such cruelty and disregard.

My thoughts were interrupted when the man in the aisle reached a hand toward me. I could feel my eyes grow wide with the realization. I’m being selected. I was lifted into the air and carried down the aisle. Looking back, the expressions ranged from terror to relief.

I was being carried. The man whose clutches I was in stopped briefly to speak to someone and it appeared money was exchanged. I have been purchased. A wave of nausea came over me as I was forced into a bag. It was then the realization hit me. Somehow I had become involved in a trafficking ring. Then everything went black.

When I came to, I was outside. The air was cool, and it was raining. At first there were only a couple of people around, but more soon arrived. I called out, but they wouldn’t even acknowledge me. Occasionally one would get close and look me over. Then another would come by and poke at me. They were smiling all the time. Everyone seemed to be in a good mood. There were plenty of smiles and laughter. This didn’t ease my nerves, but I hadn’t been harmed up to this point. In fact I was out and free to mingle with the crowd or guests, whichever they proved to be. I had to try to relax and be aware.

After a short while the smell of food filled the air. The people all gathered and ate. They were a happy bunch. I began to think that perhaps I was not in trouble after all. In fact there were happy children all about. Increasingly they began to gather around me, but then some adult would shoo them away. This had to be good. As the sun came from behind the clouds I could feel myself relax. No, perhaps this would not be so bad.

Another hour had passed. There was a group behind the tree in front of me. I could not see what they were doing, but suddenly the group erupted with cheers. Then the man who had purchased me appeared. He was smiling as he lifted me into the air and walked me into the center of the crowd. He held me high above his head eliciting cheers and laughter. I didn’t know what to think, but surely this jovial man was not about to do anything to me with so many children about.

As it turned out, I was horribly mistaken.

Without a word or warning a rope was tied around me. I was lifted into the air and spun. I couldn’t focus. The world was a blur. But it stopped suddenly when I was hit in the ribs with a large stick. The blow knocked the wind out of me. I started to spin in the other direction. I was struck in the head. Wobbling on the rope I nearly lost consciousness. What was happening, what was this? I screamed, but their cheers drowned me out. Another blow, and my arm was broken. I spun in a daze and I heard someone say that his or her time was up. I was given a momentary reprieve. It didn’t last long. Another one hit me in the back and I felt something give way. I was struck three more times in rapid secession. I felt my leg break and start to pull away. It was dead, just hanging there. I could no longer move it. Numb, I hung as the next one prepared to beat me. I was spinning at such an angle I could not see who my tormentor was. I assure you though, these people had no mercy.

This went on through a couple more rounds. Then as a name I can’t remember was called out there was another cheer. This must have been one of the leaders. I heard people screaming, “Finish him.” I could not believe it. Four shots across my chest and I was pulp. One more on the leg and I felt it give way. I would have screamed, but my mouth had long been broken.

I slowly spun. As I did, I saw my assailant as he landed what would the final blow. To my shock, it was one of the children! He was blindfolded, but hit me perfectly across the chest. As he did I felt my lower half fall away and my insides spill out. The cheers were deafening. Who were these savages? The rope holding me in the air was loosed and I crashed to the ground. I could barely see, but from what I could make out, it appeared that the children were gathering my insides in their hands and running off. I shut my eyes and prayed for a quick end.

As the world went dark I heard above the laughter a man yell out “This has been the time honored game of break the Piñata!”

Great story Joe! Thanks for letting me post it on my blog.
Hope you all enjoyed our little exercise in writing. Stay tunned, we have some ideas for new stories.

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